Beth's Blog - Musings for the Holidays

Like with birthdays, and with another year almost over, Christmas can be a time when we all reflect more.  For the good that has passed that year, the challenges faced and overcome and the promise of the new year ahead, but also for the things we have lost or are grieving, the hardships we are still facing and the things we feel we wish were different.

Having a child with additional needs of any kind can mean that Christmas might be different to the one we imagined having with our child or children and the perceived differences between us all become more apparent as we compare ourselves to the lives we see or imagine other people or families are living. 

We might have imagined buying different gifts, or compare what we buy our child to a friend buying a gift for their child of the same age, we may fear inappropriate gifts or comments from other people or be not able to do the same things. Our children’s experience of taking part in nativities or parties, visiting santa or relatives etc, might be different from what we see others experiencing or from what we imagined the holidays to look like in our heads.

I find big celebrations can be a challenge.  They can bring such huge emotions, both good and bad, and we seem to allow ourselves all the good feelings, whilst criticising ourselves hugely for the bad.

So this is a little reminder to go easy on yourself this holiday season.

Allow yourself all the feelings you need, embrace the traditions you make and what works for you and your child and family, avoid comparison, and celebrate all the positives and beautiful moments, not matter how small.  I find if I allow myself to reflect in a positive way especially, there are more beautiful moments than I realised."

And a final thought of something I stumbled on:

“We are like a snowflake, all different in our own beautiful way.” – Unknown

Beth x